Christmas Party.

A masquerade, indeed.

And I was so close to purchasing the freaking Star Wars Clone mask for the occasion.

As it was, only Lynn, Hui Yi and I brought our masks.

Incidentally, matching ones. (:

The night was fun.

It began with being conned to meet with "the girls" at SMU to rehearse a "simple dance".

After running across City Hall to get my Secret Santa present and rushing to SMU, I found out that the girls were only two, one instructor for each dance (choice of two), the first of which was NOT simple, and the other was INSANE.

But then again, it's Shuz. She's insane when it comes to dance.

The effect I would have in the outcome of the performance whilst dancing next to her would be similar to said effect if I were standing stiff and unmoving.

Or being in the next room.

Or being in the cruise to wherever with Nandini.

All eyes would be trained on her.

Perhaps including mine. Most probably including mine.

Not in a lesbian way.
But she's phenomenal.

No wonder De Cotta has a picture of her prominently taped to his wall.

:E

Let's all pretend we didn't read that.

ANYWAY, on the way to De Cotta's house Vanow narrated her experiences regarding the concert she went to. In a very animated, almost violent manner. She told us how she elbowed someone and shoved people away to get to the front. And went crazy.

More than the usual amounts.

I should have guessed it foreshadowed the games.

I think... I'm bruised in places.

But it was fun. (:

The adrenaline rush from the final game was crazy.

Jem, Olivia and me versus Sam, Soph and Vanow.

We had to kill each other.

And killing is always... exhilarating. But incredibly frightening at the same time.

Despite the fact that it's not actually your life but a symbolic representation that is being popped.

I swear in those few seconds I had, to stare down Soph and Vanow I had quickly formed a connection with the two red balloons taped to my feet. When we were counting down to GO, I swear it felt like the Hunger Games, except there's no other option but to join the blood bath at Cornucopia. I think I kept sub-consciously eyeing the gate to see if it was an acceptable option to run.

I might have been exaggerating.

But I always hate the kind of games where your life is represented as an object that can be destroyed. I hate dying. And being so vulnerable.

And if I survive in the end I always seem to end up feeling like I wasn't brave enough to kill because I was far too afraid of dying.

Either way, it is in some form unsatisfactory.

But still fun.

I drafted this post a week before I actually published it.

And there are things I can no longer remember, threads I can't pick up. Unfortunately.

But I'll keep 'em here just in case it comes up again.

Thus, ignore below. (Unless you have been reading my mind without my consent, in which case, please send me a note if you do remember... I think this was something of importance, specifically the last sentence.)

Specifically watching -

Today, I registered my phone, after several months of owning it.
I sound technologically retarded, but yeah.
It was frustrating initially cause iTunes kept freezing so I just... didn't.

Terrified myself with how trivial my concerns were and convinced myself i would be a bad mother.