i dont think its fair to expect so much from you. I apologize but i just cant help it. I cant get the facts out of my head and i cant think with you in it. I dont think you would know who you are when or if you read this, but if you do, im sorry. Im ignoring you so that you would notice im gone, and i like it when i hear that you were looking for me, but i never do. That's okay. It doesnt really matter. I have no idea why im writing this online. Those who know me might start talking and i really dont want people to think that im this kind of person coz im not. I didnt use to write this stuff, but then you came along and started changing everything and it was all out of control and ... well ... i never expected this to happen. It will all be over soon, and then everything would go back to normal.